I want to write. I want to write something worth reading. I went to see Julie & Julia yesterday with Em and it made me think. There's really no particular point to my blogs. I have no real focus, no real following, no real purpose...and at the moment, no real talent. I want to be a writer but I have no good ideas (generally, no ideas at all, good or bad). I have nothing to write about and my writing style is horribly lacking these days. I used to feel it. I could feel the little writer inside of me just boiling to burst onto the page. Now, not so much.
My fingers are anxious to write. Mainly I think I write here just to give my fingers some exercise. My cynical and depressed ramblings and rantings don't make for the most interesting reading. I think most people have gotten bored with them. I think most people have gotten bored with me. I really don't blame them, I'm bored with me so why should they be?
But that's why I'm quitting my job and going back to school. That's why I'm seeking out new employment and life experiences. There must be something in this world that can infuse my mind and heart and soul with passion for living and, more importantly, passion for writing! I was really hoping the Shakespearean Festival would do it; Dear William has had the most magnificent affect on my soul in the past...but even that little jaunt didn't trigger even a spark of creativity or imagination.
No, wait, I take it back. I did write something the day after we got back. It wasn't very good, it was just an outline for a would-be story. But then the muse fizzled out and the subject matter sort of disolved. Maybe someday that story will be worth a second thought. Not today. But something will come. Some little moment will strike my interest and I'll begin scribbling furiously and I'll come up with some sort of masterpiece! Then I'll have the right to claim myself as being a real Writer!
lalala, until then, I'll just keep exercising my fingers...sending my dull and futile attempts out into the Void... *sigh*
That's how I feel with scrapbooking lately. I'm starting to have the desire for it again but...it's not there yet where I'm willing to get out everything to actually make a page. I can relate. I can guarantee that I'm not bored with you. You're FANTASTIC and I love ya!
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