29 August 2009

Avoiding Homework

The first week of school went well. I love my Tuesday/Thursday classes the most. I suppose that shouldn't be surprising to me since they are my British Literature and Creative Writing classes. I'm not terribly fond of taking Trax and Frontrunner and I'm even less fond of taking the bus but that is the chosen mode of transportation for this semester. It is nice that I can do homework or other such activities on my way to school, but I don't like that I have to get up extra early in order to get to class. Oh well, it's part of the experience, right? Perhaps it can help to improve my writing. I can work on character development and plot content, borrowing characteristics from the people who share the commute and storylines from overheard conversation. We write about life and reality in my Creative Nonfiction class so how else am I going to have things to write about than to witness and participate in lives and reality of others?

Right now I am supposed to be working on homework. I have an assignment for my writing class that isn't due until September 8 but I haven't even come up with a theme yet. I should have two or three drafts by now (according to my teacher), at least one draft. I have some ideas for the subject matter but it all depends on how honest and revealing I am willing to be. And it depends on how personal and deep I want to go. I need an experience that will be interesting for people to read. I need to have a puropse in telling about this experience; some sort of a "life goes on (Ob-la-di, Ob-la-da)" moral. I have some of these experiences but I'm not sure how to write about them, or if I want to write about them. Some of the topics I'm tired of writing about...others I'm afraid to write about. Some seem too silly and immature, others are too mature and deep. Sigh, I just don't know what to write for class.

22 August 2009

Strangers on the Train

Yesterday my sister-in-law and I took Trax and Frontrunner up to WSU. On Frontrunner we met a rather obnoxious character. It was around 10am and he was clearly somewhat intoxicated. He started talking to us, asking us our opinion of the president. Brookie and I neither one are very interested in politics and this person clearly had his mind set on his own agenda so we knew we couldn't hold a debate against him. Brookie mainly kept quiet and let me talk. I told the guy that I would prefer not to discuss politics. He kept pressing the subject and I stood firm with my resolve to not discuss it. I wanted him to go away. He made me very uncomfortable and I didn't like his insistance and lack of respect. And I really didn't like his topic of preference. Finally, after nearly 15 minutes of trying to get me to engage in a "civil discussion" of politics and my utter refusal, he gave up and went downstairs. I wish Bobpi had been with us, he knows a lot more about politics (and he's actually interested in politics...and it would have been fun to hear him debate).

The rest of the ride to WSU was pleasant enough.

After visiting the campus bookstore we boarded the bus to take us back to the Frontrunner. A few stops from the station a woman, probably in her 60's or 70's, got on the bus and sat near Brookie. She was tallish and wore rather colorful clothing. Her hair was white and her hat was purple and bright. She was on her cell phone and I caught a bit of the conversation. She was telling the person on the other end of the line that she was planning to go on a cruise from Antarctica to Peru. Interesting. Curious.
When we got to the Frontrunner station the woman told Brookie that she is nearly blind and asked if she would help her buy a ticket. So I went to the cafe to buy sodas while Brookie helped the woman buy her ticket.

I wonder if these sorts of meetings will be a common occurance during the coming semester...

14 August 2009

1 day & 1 week

I wish that I could keep working with the kids at the CU-WSJ but not doing the work of the CU. I'm done with finance. I'm done with financial customers and questions and especially with loans!!! Well, I will be in one day and one week anyway!

I don't know what I'm going to do next though. I decided not to apply for the ICS position because they want someone who can work 8:30am-5:30pm M-F, and I can't. They want someone with 3-4 years college education in English, communications or something and I don't have that either. They want someone who wants to write procedures manuals and track internal communication...and I don't want to do that. Remember, I'm done with everything to do with finance (as a job anyway, I'd very much like to improve and increase my personal financial situation). So, in one day and one week I will bid a fond farewell to the CU and move on to something different. I only wish I knew what that something different is going to be...

I'm not sure where to look. I'm not sure what I want to do. I know what I don't want to do but figuring out what I want to do is a completely different matter.

Any suggestions?

12 August 2009

The body is willing...

I want to write. I want to write something worth reading. I went to see Julie & Julia yesterday with Em and it made me think. There's really no particular point to my blogs. I have no real focus, no real following, no real purpose...and at the moment, no real talent. I want to be a writer but I have no good ideas (generally, no ideas at all, good or bad). I have nothing to write about and my writing style is horribly lacking these days. I used to feel it. I could feel the little writer inside of me just boiling to burst onto the page. Now, not so much.

My fingers are anxious to write. Mainly I think I write here just to give my fingers some exercise. My cynical and depressed ramblings and rantings don't make for the most interesting reading. I think most people have gotten bored with them. I think most people have gotten bored with me. I really don't blame them, I'm bored with me so why should they be?

But that's why I'm quitting my job and going back to school. That's why I'm seeking out new employment and life experiences. There must be something in this world that can infuse my mind and heart and soul with passion for living and, more importantly, passion for writing! I was really hoping the Shakespearean Festival would do it; Dear William has had the most magnificent affect on my soul in the past...but even that little jaunt didn't trigger even a spark of creativity or imagination.

No, wait, I take it back. I did write something the day after we got back. It wasn't very good, it was just an outline for a would-be story. But then the muse fizzled out and the subject matter sort of disolved. Maybe someday that story will be worth a second thought. Not today. But something will come. Some little moment will strike my interest and I'll begin scribbling furiously and I'll come up with some sort of masterpiece! Then I'll have the right to claim myself as being a real Writer!

lalala, until then, I'll just keep exercising my fingers...sending my dull and futile attempts out into the Void... *sigh*

09 August 2009

2 Weeks Notice

I gave my boss two weeks notice on Friday. August 20th will be my last day of work unless something new comes up sooner.

It's very sweet-bitter (I don't like that bitter is always first). I'm excited to start a new phase. I'm excited to go back to school and I'm excited to try new things. I'm not excited to leave Double E and the guys at work. They have been so fantastic and I adore them forever! I hope they will still invite me to parties and such because I will miss them so much! V's last day was yesterday and I'll miss her as well.

But it's definitely time to move on. I've been in a moment of transition for too long now. I entered this phase two and a half years ago, thinking it would last only a few months, maybe a year at the most. It's been a good experience. I've learned a lot about finance and how things work. I now know how to buy a car so that I don't get in over my head or upside down in my payments. I have learned about credit and other loans, CD's, a little about IRA's and other savings plans. I understand more about how financial institutions work. I have been a teller, I've done new accounts and loans. I've been a supervisor and have trained others to do what I know how to do. I have worked with and met some wonderful and amazing people. Overall, it really has been a great experience.

I wish I liked numbers and finance more, I'd stay and try to work my way up further. Sadly, my heart of hearts does not love the business and so I am off to pursue the true and deep desires of my heart!

Two weeks from tomorrow I begin working toward my BA in Creative Writing at WSU! It'll be good. I have come to the conclusion that I'm going to need a BA for something that will come up in my future. I don't know why I feel so impressed to pursue my education at this moment in time, I don't know why it has taken me so long to get here...and I hope this semester doesn't end up like the Cedar City disaster. I think it will be better. I think it will work out. I don't know how. I don't know where I'm going to work or how I'm going to pay for anything but somehow things will work out. I've put in some applications and I'll put in some more if I need to. It'll be great!

Two more weeks and I'm moving on. Two more weeks and I'm making progress. Two more weeks and I'll break out of transition and into something much better!

02 August 2009

O-oh Girls Just Wanna Have Fun!

Friday we had a little Relief Society movie night. Sadly I lost a week and didn't announce it very well so there were only about 6 other girls there but it was fun anyway. We had home made carmel popcorn and chocolate chip cookies and we watched the 80's movie Girls Just Want To Have Fun. Really fun movie! It was good times and next time we'll announce it better so more people can come.

Tonight Shygirl came over. We were going to watch a movie but ended up eating pizza and talking instead. She is fantastic and I need to give her more credit. I have been craving good conversation for a while now but she's often so quiet that I forget that she's so great to talk to. We had a really good time and I feel a bit better knowing she loves me and is there for me no matter what! The only thing that would have made tonight better would have been if Bestest Friend could have come but she's really busy and couldn't make it. She did call me as she was driving home from Ogden where she had been hanging out with her boyfriend's sister. We had a short chat and that helped a little too.

Though I do miss hanging out with Bobpi and The Artist when they aren't around, it's really nice to have girl time every so often. I love it!